I was pregnant with identical twins, at 17 weeks my waters broke at work.

I was advised that I was having a miscarriage.

When arriving at hospital they scanned me and did not tell me if my babies had heartbeats. They left my partner and I thinking our babies were gone. The next day I was told they were alive and I was advised to terminate.

I did not do this. I went home and tried my hardest to save my babies, I stayed in bed and barely moved and drank gallons of water. 2 weeks later I went into labour. We made our way to the hospital and they checked me over.

Bella arrived shortly after, instead of spending time with my baby I had a cord hanging out of me due to the girls sharing a placenta. We waited for Daisy to come. After some time she was not coming. I was advised to Terminate.

I was not encouraged to hold or spend time with my daughter. I did not have a great experience with the midwife who was assigned to me that day. Eventually I had enough. I couldn’t do it any longer. I just wanted this nightmare over..so I agreed to take the termination tablets.

I was advised I would take one tablet and 12 hours later I would be given pessaries, I took one and 12 hours later Daisy was born alive and lived for 50 minutes.

The midwifes who took over that night we’re amazing but I am left with the horror memories of the experience.

I have been diagnosd with PTSD and I want to use my experience to help others.